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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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recently had an appraisel at work
ok--though one question asked --do you feel part of the team?
i put 'mostly'
this is the response i got --
1) i am expected on a regular basis to give up my mondays to cover hols --
answer from head receptionist---- but you only work 1/2 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2) please could i have a keyfob to acess the now barrierd car park---all but one member of reception staff who doesn't drive--has one--
answer--no you will have to share!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3) i somehow have got the resposibility to make sure scanning is done and kept upto date (don't ask me how it just happened)--i suggeted it would be nice to have a break and for someone else to be able to share this
answer--you (meaning me) will have to show the others ---including her-- how to do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'd like to know when!!!!!
i have to admit i am/was not quick enough to naswer back to all these but i now feel i am 'useful'--i swap my shifts am for pm to cover our branches when someone is on hols i drive the furthest out of everyone to get to work and appart from the head of reception i am the longest surving member of staff, my husband says i must stand up to her but i just go to jelly and feel very intimidated and end up agreeing with her-or feel very guilty-this applies to the manager of the surgery as well--i really feel like walking away!!!!
i am very down at the moment--tears almost happen without a thought--it sounds awfully silly but things like this are just building up---i feel i'm heading for a fall somewhere along the way
any advice? please
caz xxx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 872
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Hi Caz,
Sorry you are feeling this way,
I think situations like this are happening more and more in the economic downturn - as workplaces become more reactive to current financial conditions etc,
....and its hard to deal with especially when, as you say, you make effort to help out, then feel as if this is not reciprocated
I would advise definitely to share some of your feelings
- perhaps write things down first then ask for time to discuss with your line manager.
Maybe, build a case for key fob access - does this restrict you or make things more difficult?
if so, make sure you share this especially if relates to health conditions,
Do you have an Occupational Health team you can discuss this with?
Or GP can provide good support - my gp is fab - I dont feel like this too often but when i do, its her i go to see, off load, she listens and i feel better already,
....strangely enough...whenever it does happen, its always work related.....
Hope you are able to feel much more positive soon, its good you recognise symptoms as then you can take positive steps to do something about it,
Look after yourself Caz, will be thinking of you.
Please let us know how you get on, love Liz xxxxx
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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hi lizzie thank you for you reply
i have spoken to a member of staff --she say's i have grounds fro grievence--but i am worried this will make the situation much worse
not at all sure where to go from here
i have recieved an invitation to my nephews wedding in september
i asked yesterday for the day off as it is on a friday
and got' i'll have to look at the holiday sheet'---- am i being told i can't go!!!!!!!
we are always being told only one person on leave at a time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
another collegue had a call from the hospital over the weekend family member very ill--she drove up at the weekend and returned to work yesterday having had mon pm off and was told no compassionate leave you will have to make the time up !!!!!!!!!!!!
i find that very uncaring and thoughtless!!
anyone else feel the same
caz xxxx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 1/7/2010 Posts: 441 Location: Bristol
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Hi Caz, I've only got one functional hand at the moment and i'd like to say loads but can't type too much. 1. This place sounds dreadful! No compassionate leave? No time off for a wedding?  2. I was in a similar position with a colleague at work ... my RA got much worse because of the stress and after one particular confrontation with her one day that would normally have been water off a duck's back, I burst into tears and resigned. It was the best thing I ever did. I stopped working altogether and have seen massive changes in my health. When I'm able, I will be able to return to work a stronger person. 3. You have RIGHTS in terms of your RA. There is literature available from NRAS re employment and I would suggest a meeting at work with the powers that be where you can detail your specific needs including a parking space close to the entrance. Don't let it get you down ... try and get what you deserve. Easier said than done i know but she's no better than you and doesn't have the right to intimidate you. Good luck!!! Joanna
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 4/20/2010 Posts: 1,749 Location: Somerset
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hello Caz
You poor thing the last thing you need when you have RA . I am off work long term from my full time job
but so far they have been kind to me.
I do feel that this staff member should not be in the role they are in. Can you not speak to someone
who is more superior ?
Good luck
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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hi guys
i have always found this person to be intimidating but it seems to be much worse at the moment
maybe i am in reality not fit for work at the moment
as for speaking to her boss the manager at the practice i'm not sure as they seem to be very buddy buddy
ithis pm i have slept and woke up feeling sick
supposed to be going out to get my feet 'done' by a lovely gir and some good friendsthat i used to work with previously
hubby says it will do me good but i feel so rough
see how i feel after tea
will keep you informed
thankyou all
caz xxx
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 856
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Dear Caz
Sorry to hear about all your problems. I know how you feel though. I have an absolutely obnoxious colleague who almost seems to go out of her way to cause me stress. She knows about my RA and is aware of my limitations. She excelled herself last week though, when I asked her to cover for me the day after my dad's funeral, if I didn't feel up to going into work. She refused, so I ended up having to work even though I felt dreadful.
I was absoutely devastated that someone could be so callous. I rarely have time off due to RA I've tried talking to our line manager but I don't get any support because she' very good at putting on an act and twisting things to get her own way. Thankfully she's like it with others so I'm not the only one. I'm actually now keeping records of everything as I feel that one day I might have to take further action . I'd rather not though- all I want is to be able to get on with my job. I have never worked with anyoe like that before- I've always had good working relelationships.
I hope things improve for you
Take care
Maria x
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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hi maria
i'm the same
all this seems to stem from when the 'new' girls joined over the last 2 years
i can't blanket them all with the same brush as 2 out of the three are lovely and are also being treated badly when the mood suits
but one inparticular gets away with 'murder'
mistakes happen i know but when you blanket all the staff with what was her own mistake it seems very unfair
if anything goes wrong the person involved should be pulled to oneside and discussed with the line manager but no --it is brought up in the meetings as if we are all making the same error which i think is very unfair --not only on the staff who are not at fault but on the memebr who made the error --it can be and is very embarassing.
or is it just me???
like you i am going to keep a record of things that are going.
i hope we can both get things sorted without too much of a problem
take care maria
love caz xx
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 872
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I would recommend anyone unable to get to the workwise workshops to enquire via NRAS if any of the accompanying literature can be sent out - i went to Birmingham last week, it was VERY helpful.
I think there may be a few dates still to come, have to check NRAS website - the evening was a real mine of information and support and all very relevant to these discussions, I definitely recommend further investigation about this xx
I think the biggest problem is very often the "invisibility" and/ or lack of awareness and understanding of RA that can cause employment problems with both employers and colleagues...
Take care all and especially make sure to take time to relax and soak up the sunshine - its s'posed to rain sometime soon this week, i think
Lots of love ~ Liz xxx
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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hi all
my line manager changes her mood with the winD!!!!!!!
on her way out of work tonight----carol --remind me tomorrow and i will put the wedding on the chart for you
why she couldn't have said that in the first place indstead of --i'll have to check the holiday chart---URRRGGGGG
thank goodness it is resolved the way things were left last week i honestly thought i would have a battle on my hands
caz
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 856
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No Caz- it's not just you. I suppose I've been fortunate all these years and never had problems or encountered such an obnoxious person. She's ignoring me at the moment, so I supose I should enjoy it while it lasts! I'm beginning to think she has a massive chip on her shoulder,not as good as she thinks she is, and takes it out on me.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 5/19/2010
Posts: 384
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Hi Caz
Sorry you are experiencing this type of bullying at work.
I once worked as head receptionist in a large secondary school and a new school bursur was appointed, she was a bully and tried to undermine everything you did, you was frightened to make snap decisions because she would always have something negative to say.
I find people like this are very insecure, and feel quite sorry for them as they rarely have a happy life outside of work and few friends, needless to say she didn't last long.
Anne x
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 856
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Annie-
I came to the same conclusion about my 'colleague from hell'- she isn't as well qualified/ experienced as me , takes on too much thn can't cope,frequently makes cock ups and it seems that her way of deaing with it is to undermine and belitte me as much as possible! I just try to smile nicely and ask her not to speak so unpleasantly to me. It rarely works! Sad person,really.
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Rank: Newbie  Groups: Registered
Joined: 5/23/2010 Posts: 7
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Hi
Im lucky I have involved my employers on this journey and they are very understanding, however i go to work everyday feeling like crap most of the time!! but i turn up.
and there is a 21year old off with stress!!! ahhhh makes my blood boil had to ask again to ensure i heard right!!!
So to all us disabled workers its a kick in the teeth.
Claire
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/21/2009
Posts: 106
Location: cornwall
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hi claire
I have also involved my employers all the way ---when things first started i was getting no where so i requested OH appointment-- telling them just about everthingthat happens ---the trouble is this partcular person --i get the impression she thinks i'm palying games with her'
i work in a gp's surgery and you would think that there would be some understanding
the partner gp's are really good but won't get involved in staff issues --"we have a manager for that"--which i don't blame them for as the presuure's from thier side are never ending.--i do keep them informd tho i find i can have a quick word with them re meds nad altho not registerd there they are happy to --on ocassion--to give advice or say see your gp if something sounds iffy
it is the lead receptionist that is the most awkward--sometimes i don't think she has any idea--
like you i fell bl--dy awful most days but i will still go in --the other receptionists say they can tell when i am really 'off ' as i am generally white as sheet--but she just ooohhh i don't know --i wouldn't say she doesn't care but sometimes i do wonder
as an example--today --daily letters to scan--so first comment from her was can you do front desk AND scanning --she'es having a laugh---isaid no and i would work from one of the phone desks .the look was well you know--- maybe she ought to try it !!!!
GGGRRRR--i just get myself so wound upp
sorry guys
caz xxx
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